Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Is it time for Plan B? (Or C or D....)

I've noticed a curious thing in books and articles on the job search - they never address when you're supposed to give up and move on.  I know it's not in the American spirit to quit (even if you're Spencer and Heidi), but I wonder if there's a point when you should throw in the towel and go to Plan B?  

For people like me and 'Bones' who possess a rational and logical mind, it feels wrong to perform the same task over and over, under the same conditions - receive the same outcome every time - and expect that one day the outcome will be different.  In pursuit of a scientific structure to my job search, I've tried tweaking certain variables to see if my results are different (adding an objective, deleting an objective, saying I understand Sarbanes-Oxley, using humor, finding an "in" at the company, etc.).  But the results are always the same - no job.  I actually told Craigslist that if they hired me to work in accounts payable, that "all their wildest dreams would come true."  It's shocking I didn't get an interview. 

I'd like to do an experiment where I leave everything in my resume the same, but say that I have a Harvard MBA instead of my actual school - I've been too lazy to do the work (retyping over one word) to actually test this theory, but I'm also a little afraid that I'll actually get an interview.  

So when is it time to quit and move on?  And how should one move on?  Do you put on some orange tights and interview at Hooters?  Do you enroll in clown college?  Do you move to Canada for free healthcare?  Do you sell your plasma?  Do you pull a 'Weeds' and start slinging ganja?  Do you form a Foreigner cover band and try to win Battle of the Bands?  And how long until you have to start taking your clothes off for money?  <--These are the questions that never get answers in "What Color is Your Parachute?".    

After the recession blows over, it'll be interesting to hear about what people did for money during hard times.  For me, I'm hoping the answer doesn't involve drug testing, drug muling, or singing backup for Spencer Pratt.      

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